THE QUESTION . . .

How tough is my Love for my wife?

Remembering the book TOUGH TIMES NEVER LAST BUT TOUGH PEOPLE DO, by Dr. Robert Schuller; made me to ask myself THE QUESTION; 
 How tough is my Love for my wife?
 Will it stand the test of time?

How we imagine what love should look like has a huge impact on our satisfaction in marriage and our acceptance of what it is and how strong it should be. A Pastor named Dan Little (Binghamton, NY), mentioned a wonderful image in a sermon about biblical love, and this gave me a spark that I will like to share it with you; It’s a powerful though unusual image of marital commitment that will surly help us see the need to make our love for each other Tough. The following are his words:

Forgive me ladies for the very romantic thing I am about to say …, but the commitment that makes a marriage (or a church, or any other relationship), work is as tough as tyres. Is that romantic or what? Try that tonight. Kiss your spouse goodnight and say, “My love for you is as tough as tyres—truck tyres.”  Your spouse will melt in your arms, I’m sure.

I really could not get the message from the beginning.  But after considering the following truth as he explained about the tyre’s feature, I was highly impressed and challenged to uphold and cherish this truth. Let us consider this truth together; Tyres can slog through 200º road heat and 30º below zero cold, roll over sharp stones and glass, in and out of potholes; get punctured and be fixed, they come to screeching halts or make quick starts and bear up under the g-force of quick turns, and they do all this while carrying thousands and thousands of pounds. It is also true that there are many days when tyres roll over miles of rough roads, pleasant and smooth highways.  That is true of marriage as well. It carries us into both pleasant and unpleasant experiences.  But here is what tyre-tough real love does not do. It does not say, “I will only carry the load in the best of conditions.” This kind of love does not demand that everything fit perfectly into its own specific best form. 

 This kind of commitment calls for a determined heart that is purposely willing to keep loving with only but one target which is making the relationship work even when it looks hopeless; just as the Scripture reveals in 1 Cor 13:4-8a: Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

I love this image.  It may not sound romantic, but it’s true to life and true to Scripture. The world’s Romantic love is truly unstable as soap bubbles. Therefore, it is very important for us as God’s Children to make the difference clear, that Biblical marital love, as Dan so clearly states, is like “tough tyres–truck tyres” that go the distance and overcome the elements. 

Let’s not GIVE UP on our love for our spouses even when it’s tough to love. Let’s love.

Grace of our Lord be with us. Amen

Rev. Isaac G. Y Bangalu
Founder & CE Couples & Singles Network for Christ Initiative